14 July 2000

Reading:  The Dancing Wu Li Masters by Gary Zukav

Project:  8MoreMiles.com

I spent virtually the entire evening at the West Alabama Icehouse tonight.  It was an excellent evening, as Pete was back from Greece, a cover band from UH that I've heard before was playing, and there was a happy, friendly crowd (with a lot of new faces).

Being the people watcher that I am, I had plenty to entertain me.  But I found one contrast that was particularly stark and that said so much about life that I have to write about it.

An older lady who must remain nameless came by briefly.   I had been told about her -- how a certain offspring of hers, who can only be described as an unhappy, bitter pain in the ass, had nothing on her mother, who truly sets the standard.  I still can't judge that claim from personal interaction, because I've had none thank gawd!  What I can say is this was the most shriveled, bitter, bitchy looking woman I have seen in a long time, perhaps my entire life.  I'm told her daughter takes after her in that happiness in anyone must be stamped out -- she is unhappy, so rather than fix the source of that, she revels in making everyone around her miserable.  The physical appearance of the mother reveals what a lifetime of that attitude accomplishes -- she's a wretched, ugly, shriveled woman.

Contrast this with Mrs. Burns.  Mrs. Burns is an older lady who, despite her appearance, is probably roughly the same age as BitterWoman described above.  Mrs. Burns is a regular at the Icehouse, usually appearing on Saturday nights, and she has taken a great liking to me.  She is a delightful woman who just radiates warmth.   The first night I talked to her at any length at the Icehouse, she told me she came there to drink a few beers and smoke her cigarettes and to watch the young people, because it made her happy to see people having such a good time, and it made her feel young.   Indeed, Mrs. Burns looks young -- not esthetically, which really doesn't matter anyway, but in the way that matters most:  her eyes lit up and dancing, her smile of recognition when first seeing a friend, the overall way she springs about the place.  Mrs. Burns is a woman who understands happiness, who lives it, who appreciates it in others -- and who, consequently, looks it.

The other woman represents a way I never want to be.